Feb 23, 2009

How to survive and live happily in Malaysia

1) This is the golden rule.
Never talk or think about Malaysian politics as it can makes you feel nauseating and very sick. Breaking this rule will make your life hell in this heavenly country.

2) Do as the Romans do.
As the majority of Malaysians are of average IQ, you must not show your intelligence lest you get chastised. When the goons say to boycott American and Jewish goods, you should show your agreement with them even if you know that their stupidity is beyond comprehension.

3) Play the blame game.
You must learn this game from the politicians as they seem to do no wrong. They have got every reason for their blunders and fiasco. When landslides occurred, they will blame the weather. When they have uttered offensive remarks, they will blame the medias for having misquoted them. So, when you cannot achieved your company's objectives, blame it on the Americans, blame the sluggish economy and blame Badawi.
When you hair starts dropping, blame it on Aji-No-Moto.

4) Be brave.
a) Bravery of the sinners: One must be brave enough to defend your power by all means.You can plot to remove your enemies by whatever evil means possible, even to the extend of committing murder. Before you venture into this evil journey of bravery, one must not be afraid the wrath of God who will strike with untold retributions that will await you and your family.

b) Bravery of the fighters: When the weak are being bullied by those evils in power, one must be strong willed and courageous enough to fight back. The weak must be united and gather whatever resources available to fight the evils. If this fails, then pray for divine intervention because ultimately, the good will triumph over the evil.

If you cannot be either one and would like to be an ordinary contented Malaysian, then go back to rule number one.

Related posts: Malaysian politicians

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